Eat, My Little Chickadees

Why do women gain so much weight from the time they're teenagers until the next time you see them at your 10 year highschool reunion for instance? If my office is any indication of what happens, then I completely understand...

What a second, I can't believe I'm actually hearing these bitches talking about buying X-mas trees already. It's Oct 14th for the love of Christ! Whatever, people are crazy.

Anyway, back to the point of this message. So, women are always complaining about their weight but aren't ever wanting to put forth any sacrifice to lose the weight. Today's pop culture isn't helping this way of thinking either. Our society is obsessd with the quick fix, the instant gratification, the I-don't-want-to-work-for-it-I-want-it-now theory. Hence, tv plays off this fact and produces shows like "The Swan", "Extreme Makeover", "Dr. 90210", etc. What's next? God, I feel like my whole view makes me sound old, I feel like those old men who say "when I was younger, I had to walk 50 miles to get to school in the morning". I guess I shouldn't be looking at this issue with disgust, I should be using my God given right as an American and do what so many have before me... cash in on this shit! On one hand, people, for the most part, are just really stupid and deserve to be taken advantage of. Not to say I haven't fallen for some things in my lifetime but I feel that I've learned from my mistakes. I've lost a lot of respect for the general public when I see people falling for the South Beach Diet, Hamptons Diet, and whatever the next rich city diet will be. Whatever happened to eating balanced and exercising regularly? It's not "extreme" enough for people these days, it's too simple for people to, so call, "digest". NO carbs or NO fat... what the fuck? It doesn't have to be like that. I guess marketing people are the true geniuses in life. On the other hand, I could never take advantage of people just for the fact that I couldn't whore out my belief system just to make a buck. I was brought up better than that.

You know, I shouldn't include all women. Actually, all women talk about their weight but a very minute percentage are only willing to do something about it. For example, this girl I work with drinks soda first thing when she gets here in the morning, then she proceeds to chow on candy for a good part of the day. She doesn't work out and has somehow maintained to stay pretty thin, granted she is 23 so time will have to set in before she develops her FUPA at an early age. That's a Fat Upper Pussy Area for our more naive viewers, if any, out there. But whenever I decide to take an occasional treat or eat a not so healthy lunch every once in awhile, she's the first to warn me about the calorie count in my food. Of course, she's not the only one, most of the women are like this in my dept. It's extremely fucking annoying. Then they gossip about US Weekly and wish how they had bodies like those women in there. Well, I don't know how many calories you can lose complaining but I guarantee it's less than if you were over at the gym doing something about it. Then they all talk to each other about every meal past, present, and future... "What did you have for dinner last night?", "What are you going to have for (insert meal here) today?", "What are you going to eat tomorrow?", it goes on and on and on. It's exhausting to listen to this all the time. Are most women like this when they're around each other, God, I hope not. I don't remember my mom and her friends always discussing food in that detail. I guess this is another reason why I just don't understand women.