Couple past weekends

2 weekends ago...
Friday: Travelled to hell on earth on Friday after work. In case you don't know what I'm talking about, it's the car impound. I had to help my roomie pick up his Betsy (the toy pickup he keeps around as his Home Depot vehicle). Poor ole Betsy had 69 tickets on her old ass. That cost my roommate approx $5K. He actually told them to keep the thing but when they informed him that his license would be suspended, he broke the wallet open. As you can imagine, the impound lot is not the most efficient of organizations so a simple getting your car out their lot even after you paid can take the upwards of about 2 hours. Oh, it was colder than a witches teet out there so that just added to the funness.

The excursion of course made me late to my real plans which entailed playing poker that night. It's too bad I didn't make it on time, otherwise, my friends could have taken even more of my money. I think I would have had more fun if all of them just took a turn swinging a bag of nickels at my crotch.

Saturday: I went to a bday party at Chicago Tap. Although, it was pretty low key, it was good to see some of the MU guys and catch up a bit. Afterwards, we went to Grand Central. Actually, to my surprise there were a lot of lookers around... unapproachable but at least it was something. I bumped into an old friend from my last job. She looked really good that night. We both pretty much ignored our friends while we played a gruesome game of fuck/kill/marry with all the people we knew from the old job. It was pretty fun. Then instead of asking if she wanted to go somewhere else, I opted for the less embarassing route in case she wasn't on the same level and told I was going to head home and we should do it again and blah, blah, blah. It was the safe move, and probably the better choice since over the past year or so, I've been terrible at reading people.

However, on the way home, I received a very drunk call from two of my girls that wanted to come over and hang out... they even said they would make out with each other. So we were up at my bar for a couple and I thought enough of this nonsense and told them that I wanted some action soooo make out or do whatever. Unfortunately, they balked at my demands. But I did get the next best thing... I got to make out with both of them... and I got to touch their boobies. (Sidenote: I love typing boobies, such a great word, it makes me laugh everytime) Then they wanted to sleep over to which I obliged. In retrospect, it was a mistake. We were getting ready for bed and they want certain tee-shirts and it's too cold and now it's too hot and I don't want the fan blowing on me and I'm not comfortable and I'm thinking "please shut the fuck up". Instead, I just made out with them some more to shut them up, touched their boobies a little bit more and then rolled over and went to bed. "Why did you stop there?" some may ask. Well, we all have a very good mutual friend b/w us. In fact, this girl is another girl I used to work with and these are her two best friends. I just didn't want a bunch of that shit coming back to me in a week and also, we would have woke up the next morning and we would have all been saying "wow, that was a mistake".

Sunday: Recovery day

This weekend...
Friday: Had a meeting after work to discuss commercial real estate. Yes, I'm trying to teach myself the ins and outs of commercial real estate. I don't know how far this is going to go but I like what I've been learning so far. Afterwards, me and two friends went to the following starting at midnight...

1. Nick's Beergarden - why? Because we thought we would get there before the lame ass crowd beat us. Result: We were wrong, not only were there plenty of chotchbags in attendance, but Pizza Da Face made us stand out in the blistering cold while he did his one in one out bullshit. "Dude, you work at Nick's... no really, Nick's Beergarden" gimme a break.

2. We dropped that idea and went a couple doors down to Rodan - best described as the Wicker-Park-starving-artist-trust-fund-baby-hipster bar. Seriously, these people were trying to act like the alternative shit but it was just another facade. I wasn't really dressed for it and I felt people naturally gravitate away from me as I walked through the place.

3. Pint - no crowd. We sat in the corner like 3 jamochs (sp?) and tried to jumpstart the night with a couple shots. The one guy with us Tom (aka Tommy Charms) goes and hits on a girl that had at least 5 inches on him without even any eye contact. And seeing that it was her bday and her bf was working right behind the bar she was sitting at, he didn't do such a bad job. The guy even bought him a shot. Everyone kept it friendly and respectful though so things were cool.

4. Tavern - the new Borderline. Same shit, just not as ghetto. Last time I was in there, I beat someone with my belt. That was a long time ago. At this point I came to the conclusion that all the hot women had been locked up for the winter and I was left with all guys and the girls who can't get play over the warmer months. So my friend and this other guy were "competing" on this other girl. So this guy is talking about something in Africa and decide to butt in and go on a huge rant about genocide. If you didn't know, genocide never makes for a wet beave. My kill obviously led to her taking off the other way which I have to say, I did both guys the favor. Apparently, Mr. Stranger Danger didn't see it my way and his comeback was and get this... "hey, you were that guy who starred in Operation Dumbo Drop". But he didn't stop there, he kept bringing all his friends around and introducing me. You know, it was definitely lame but somewhat funny in an off-the-wall-you're-an-uber-chotch kind of way. But you know, I didn't have a comeback to it so there was really nothing to say. Instead, we just left.

5. Estelle's - had to wait outside in the coldest night of the year for about 20 min. Has it really come down to this? I guess. Still, we still had a glass is half full attitude on the night. Nothing was going to get us down no matter how bad the night was sucking. Well, I thought nothing could get us down until we got in the place. I was talking to N when Tom goes off to talk to whomever. Next thing I know, N is jumping by me to get to a guy who hit Tom. I see a guy hit N and I just start swinging. Of course the guy I hit was a 6'6" black guy. Well, it was too late then so I just kept swinging and the guy fell so I gave him a few more with my fists and feet. Then I picked him up in sort of a headlock and I took a look at him. Besides the realization that my night officially sucked, I came to another realization... Me talking to black guy "Oh shit, hey, what's up man, I went to highschool with you, what's going on?" Then I explained that there must be a huge miscommunication b/c my friends were cool and I don't know what happened. My contingent had been thrown out and somehow they let me out the back alive. I eventually found those guys back at N's place. Tom's eye was closed up and N's nose was a little puffy but no permanent damage. I don't know how I didn't get a whacking but I'll take it. Some would say I need it. Tommy wanted to go back their with a bunch of people and kill everybody but I was able to calm everyone down, well, enough that no one went back there. Actually, Tommy left N's and just to make sure he didn't go back there, we drove over there and waited for him for about 15 min. He said he wasn't but something in the way he said it didn't make me entirely believe him.

Sat, Sun, Mon (Pres Day): Grounded myself from all partying activities. Everytime I go out these days, something bad happens. I'm too old for that shit anymore.

Now what do I do?