GMAT sux a deek!

It was brought to my attention today that I have not been acting like myself lately. All I have to say is "no shit, sherlock". Not only can I not get my lazy ass up in the morning to hit the gym like I used to, I didn't get my promotion b/c my company decided to cut headcount thus freezing any advancement for the time being, at the same time I've come to realize that the people who get promoted the fastest are the ones who like fucking corporate robots, I'm dating a girl (as amazing, caring, wonderful as she is by the way) who I've never even met before and have no idea when I will b/c crazy circumstances keep popping up, we're taking care of a dog that annoys the shit out of me primarily b/c he eats everything, I'm fucking horny as hell, the Bears and the rest of Chicago sports always suck, I have a roommate that can't lift his ass up for 2 seconds to pick up one thing or help out, and I started this GMAT class that is kicking my ass. Imagine that the only smile that's been brought to my face lately was the Red Sox ousting the Yankees. I don't even live or have ever lived in Boston. I guess it's just b/c I can't stand New York that much. But if that's all I'm smiling about lately, then I have problems.

Time for some new scenery?
Time for a change?
Time to get out of town?
Time to leave things behind and start fresh?

Maybe.

After the whole Labor Day fight thing went down and Nick got stabbed, people kept telling me how lucky I was b/c we have so much to live for. True, I'm lucky that the guy who sucker punched me in the side of the head didn't stick a knife in my head instead and I was able to turn that around and beat the guy senseless. I guess I just don't understand why I have so much to live for. I live well but I'm not fond of my surroundings. In almost every aspect of my life, I'm treated like an insignigicant factor. The gov't treats me like a number, my job treats me like a drone, when I'm out women treat me as if I'm not there b/c I'm not flashing a BMW key, bartenders treat everyone like shit even after they bend you over for $10 for the worst poured K1 & tonic, the list goes on. Gotta say the treatment is getting tiring. Just b/c I breathe doesn't mean I have a lot to live for. I come to work everyday to sit in the cube farm with the rest of consumer society. What it comes down to with the majority of people who are in the same situation as myself (and that number includes many twenty-somethings), is that people don't have dreams to pursue anymore, they just go after the easy fix. That is, something good to eat, the next sale at the department store, etc. They fail to acknowledge their shallow existence and fill their void with material products. Well shit, these thoughts are nothing new to anybody but no one's willing to admit it. It's true, ignorance is bliss and that's good enough for most.

Confessions of an Amaya G

Wow, this posting that Amaya wrote about me was the single nicest thing anyone has ever written about me. What an amazing woman...

Baby, I love you. You are my life. My happiest moments won't be complete if you're not by my side. You're my relation and connection to the sun. With you next to me there's no darkness I can't overcome! You and God, whose my sunlight are blooming so beautifully.

Baby, I'm so proud, proud to be your girl. You make the confusion go away from this cold and empty world. I am in love with you and you've set me free. I can't do this thing called life without you here with me. I'm so in love with you and I'll never leave. Just keep loving me the way I love you loving me.

And I know you love me. You love me for who I am. No, it's not easy loving me, but I appreciate the love and dedication that you give so unselfishly. I see my whole future in your eyes. And the thought of all my love for you almost makes me want to cry. I realize all of my blessings and I'm grateful to have you by my side. Everytime I see your face Eric, my heart smiles. And again, I'll never leave just keep loving me the way I love you loving me!!!

Confessions of an El Ride

I saw a Her this morning. I can't believe I caught a Her. A Her is one of those few women out there who make time stop when you she first catches your eye. I walked into my usual car on the el and turned right. As I lifted my head to see where I would be able to grab a bar to stand, there she was sitting on the right side, aisle, 3rd row from the door. As she looked up at me, time slowed down until it came to a halt. The whole moment took maybe about 2 seconds but felt like it took 20 minutes. It was much like when you slowly apply pressure with your finger to a record that's spinning until it stops and then you suddenly let go again. That's definitely the closest comparison that I can come up with at this time. She had dark red hair that was tied back and held closely to her head. It was shorter than I expected and wondered how she would style it if she wore it down.